Holistic Therapy Tip: How To Reconcile After A Disagreement Or Fight
It’s tough always sharing space with others and this can also resonate for your partner or children. Sometimes within sharing a life it can difficult to navigate COVID precautions of being at home and also knowing that a majority of the outdoor and community options are currently closed with no ETA for reopening. You’ve at most got the beach, the park, and the grocery store. Spending so much time together as a result of COVID precautions can definitely have some beautiful quality time silver linings. Spending so much time with loved one’s can also cause frustration or impatience from limited space, lack of time alone, or different personality needs for communication.
In the next paragraphs we’ll look at some Holistic Therapy tools that you can use to reconcile after having a disagreement with any loved ones at home or when you are in close quarters.
Stop The Conversation Respectfully When You Feel it’s Getting Unproductive
The conversation started out normal with no signs of tension and slowly turned into a disagreement with misunderstandings and emotions flying all over the place. When you realize the interaction or conversation is turning into an unproductive disagreement consider that it may be time and best to stop the conversation gracefully and let your partner or loved one know that you would like to stop the conversation for a short break for both you and the other party to be more calm and collaborative in the conversation.
You can offer a timeline on when you will feel ready to revisit the conversation or consider making a timeline with your partner that there will be an established about of time attached with when you or they opt to have communication breaks so there is collaboration even when disagreement occurs. For children it may be best to consider 30 minutes or an hour if your children are older. For adults you can consider 24 hours or a few days depending on the disagreement intensity level.
It’s also important that both you and your partner return with the goal of collaboration after having a communication break so if you or your partner still feels angry, frustrated, or closed for collaboration it’s important that you and your partner check in about that before trying to revisit the disagreement.
Take Space After The Disagreement
After you and your partner or loved one have talked about taking a communication break it’s important that you take space from the disagreement by not communicating with the other party about the disagreement until the communication break closes. This does not mean you need to avoid your partner or loved one, you can still talk with them about other things if you’d like. You can still share meals or join them for activities as well. You ultimately are creating space from the disagreement, nit necessarily the person. You’ll need to determine what you need and what your loved one will need while holding space for a communication break.
Come Together to Have A Collaborative Resolution Conversation With Tangible Actions
Once the communication break closes you ideally now have space and opportunity to work on having a collaborative resolution conversation for the disagreement. This is where you can use the data from your disagreement to create potential solutions to the disagreement. Ideally while your having your communication break, you’ll also consider solutions for the disagreement to be resolved.
It’s important if you and your partner to look into tangible solutions although there’s likely a dual conversation focused on the resulting feelings and impact from the disagreement. Look at opportunities for you or your partner to discuss solutions that can heal the frustrations of the disagreement to increase the likelihood that the disagreement doesn’t resurface over and over again. Sometime this may be therapy, this may be creating a chore list, this may mean revamping a shared schedule, this may mean creating downtime independently or other tangible resolutions may surface as well.
The goal of disagreement is to be clear on your own expectations and to collaborate with loved ones when appropriate to create shared expectations. Sometimes there’s going to be more compromise than you might have imagined and sometimes there will be none, the context will change as the disagreements change too.
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