Hello Beautiful Wellnista,
I'm so excited to start a new series which brings Wellness Coaching to a whole-nother level. In the ICoach series I pair popular songs that highlight an important emotional experience and then provide my best support and advice as a Whole Health Holistic Wellness Coach and Clinician.
Episode 1 of ICoach is dedicated to: Beyonce "Daddy Lessons"
My Summary of Daddy Lessons:
A young girl is raised by her father is taught to be strong, tough, and take care of her family. In some aspects she had difficulties with some of the life lessons he provided "It wasn't alway right, Daddy made me fight".
In adulthood the girl turned woman reflects on the tension and gifts held within her interpersonal relationship with her father. Her father warned her that men like "him" would come into her life and to "shoot" or avoid them. The woman's relationship with who her dad was during his life and who she loves also seems to be woven into the song's message. The ultimate message appears around letting go and being strong and recalling what her father taught her.
Quote From Daddy Lessons: "Daddy made a soldier out of me".
Emotions Under The Lyrics:
Sometimes in life, we get used to being a strong tough girl (Pillar of Strength), or always having to be ready for people to disappoint, threaten, or fail us. Being tough and prepared is okay up to a point but once you reach the phase of losing enjoyment in your relationships or environment, it's time to take a step back and evaluate the overlap.
Tips and next steps:
1. Find a safe space. Create rest from practicing the role of "Pillar of Strength". You deserve balance and if you create spaces where you can move freely you will feel more freedom, connection, and positive energy. Generally when we feel safe in environments is when we are able to be the most present version of ourselves.
2. Let your guard down: Practice being vulnerable. Cry, admit when you make mistakes, try something new that will help you step out of " Pillar of Strength" character. This can be something as simple as taking a new class, or sharing something with a trusted friend that makes you feel vulnerable. Or ask for help, this is usually pretty difficult for "Pillar of Strength" personality types.
3. Think about why you feel like this way: Is there something you are avoiding? Is there something in this experience that you enjoy? There is usually an answer for both. You might be avoiding chaos of the unknown or feeling emotionally weak and in the very same experience appreciate being a pillar of strength because it provides a sense of control... just some ideas.
4. Think about what facts or emotions validate this feeling: Is there any factual information from your experience that is enabling you to be in "Pillar of Strength" character? Maybe your family or friends encourage you to lead because then they will get to coast if your in charge. Or maybe you get good feedback from your friends and family when you act as the "Pillar of Strength". Again, just some ideas.
*These are suggestions for general consideration, my coaching suggestions will vary based on individual client context and detail.
Watch the video below to find out more:
For the Win!
I hope you enjoyed this episode of ICoach featuring Beyonce's Daddy Lessons! Sound off in the comments below, what song should ICoach review next?
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Wishing you all the best,
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*Results may vary.